October and The Fall

How I miss the fall some days. Today, actually, isn't one of them, but I thought I'd throw it out anyway. WYD, do you remember at TU that one pick-a-date where I so desperately wanted to go with...oh shit, I can't even say his name because I have my blog listed on facebook and you never know. Anyway, we all went on a hay ride. I think you went with my brother that time...It was fun. I do love the feeling of just cold where you nose starts to turn pink everytime you go outside and a jacket becomes necessary and you just start having the excuse to clean out your fireplace and start chopping wood in the backyard. Eh. However, I noticed that in CT for one it's not that cold yet even though Halloween is quickly charging us.

This doesn't have to say anything

I just need to get my blog blood flowing. It's always so disappointing to me when other bloggers with whom I am in conversation, let their blogs go to the flies.

My little sis, Lyds, is in town. Yayaya. Two and a half weeks. And she's seriously considering making the next phase of her life out here, somewheres. Nice.

I'm going through my drop after coffee and lunch. All my blood's in my belly helping my food to digest and my eyes are droopy droopy droopy. Plus I've been missing sleep for the past three nights. Curses.

namesake

So it's past midnight and i'm not sleeping, only this time it is the rare coin in the purse. I've been going to bed eaaarly these past few weeks, but today I'm waaaay behind on my editing, like I can feel my body off balance, my head heavy falling behind me and my neck straining to bring it upright again or else my neck my keep growing and growing and growing, with the rubbery texture of playdough until, oops, it just rolls right off my body. So, anyway, I need to catch up now. Even so, I will sleep now and continue working tomorrow and the next day and the next. The day after those, though, B and I are finally taking a bit of time off the islands. Hurray. We're going to Del Mar for the final weekend of horserace season. I guess B's part (ticket and hotel) are a bonus from his boss who's into the race scene (hobby) and so we're all going down together to paaaarty. That'll will be a much-needed hop and skip off HI.

My body loves that I quit. My head sometimes still beats me with a death stick, tempting me to light it before I turn into a bloody pulp from the beating. But I say NOOOO! Ha.

sales update

I'm now at $10,000 ish for the month (one cannot take commission till you top $30,000 in sales). That other woman I spoke of is at $75,000 for the month. Apparently last August, she topped $300,000!!! AHAHAHAHAHA. She's been working here 11 years and she speaks Japanese but common! Give me a motha-fking break! Yipes.

winds of change...

...27 years and kicking...
...quit smoking on Monday, feel fine most moments, occasionally want to kick someone in the groin, mostly my withdrawals happen at night in the form of repeated sudden jolts of wide-awakeness, a grab at air like I might be drowning, and a piss before wafting back down into my slumber...
...switched my nicotine craving focus to a caffeine focus; once I get the former under control, I'll kick the latter as well...
...sold $2,000 worth of art so far this month as compared to our top saleswoman at $55,000 and running...
...find I have much more energy than before and maybe my brain is playing tricks on me but i think i can smell better too...
...miss our discussions on soulandmeat, maybe we should make them less formal, less formidable; i know unless i feel well read on a subject, i won't venture an opinion, so maybe we should broaden the subjects and let them flow where they will through our discussions, dunno...
...the summer is still high and flying, crystal blue sky waters green and aqua with bright yellow and orange fish with black stripes, sunspots filtered on cobbled streets, and happy jabber and tinkling laughter everywhere you look; weeeeeeee...

Sundays in the summer

Today is a good day. I feel it mixed in with all my other sloppy hungover emotions. Drank last night with the boys, B's boys. It's always fun, a gaggle of jugo men, drinking, smoking, laughing, and I, sitting there, trying to catch a thread of the conversation or begging someone or other to translate when they laugh particularly hard or when i think the gossip might be juicy. Drinking and smoking. And good god....cold turkey and mayo sandwich coming right uppo.

Sunday at work, august five. B's home or swimming or shopping or sleeping or who knows whatwhere. And I'm sitting here, strangely upbeat for the hangover and ominous cloud hanging over my tomorrows. Excited and anticipating another phase.

Hmmm...

p.s.

meme just passed her drivers license test. again. ooph